marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
