WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
