I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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