Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
