Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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