the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
