I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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