But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
