i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
he just fucked me for my cheese..
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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