Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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