so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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