I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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