I have demons in me.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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