I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
