I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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