Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.