I think my vagina is haunted
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i dont even know how to be here
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
