HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize