So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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