toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
COCAINE IS GR8
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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