I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I think I won the penis lottery.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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