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• (469): View more from Texas

  Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...

  Fav 6 4614 1139

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.

  Fav 21 4322 2079

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• (207): View more from Maine

  Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........

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  25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (870): View more from Arkansas

  To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  That was beautiful.

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• (310): View more from California

  It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.

  (415): View more from California

  That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.

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  These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (513): View more from Ohio

  I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  We're too hungover to prance.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.

  Fav 2 108 208

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  i'm high and self actualising, please send help

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