Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.

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(248): View more from Michigan

the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

worst lay ever....

(780): View more from Alberta, CA

as long as you cum, there is no bad sex

(403): View more from Alberta, CA

ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement

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(571): View more from Virginia

I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.

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27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Read it at the TFLN blog
(440): View more from Ohio

sarcasm needs its own font

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(250): View more from British Columbia

you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".

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(804): View more from Virginia

she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"

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(541): View more from Oregon

I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.

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(702): View more from Nevada

Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan

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