Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Everything about him screamed your future.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Randomize
