your thong is hanging out like whoa
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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