Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
