Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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