Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Randomize
