sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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