I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.