Ambien. No doubt about it.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Randomize
