if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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