You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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