Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
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