whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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