Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
