if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
