so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
