I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
