well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
