just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
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At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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