threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Sext me about skeletons
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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