Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
babies were throwing up all over the place
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize