i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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