I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
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A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
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I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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