hell yes lets make some ravioli
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
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i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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