Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
