We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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