my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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