i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
