$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
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